He walked into the book store.
The section where the rich tell their stories.
Rich dad, poor dad was selling out fast; every family in his neighbourhood had a copy, but with no difference in their way of life.
He was looking for something that would speak to him. Something that would help him sort out the mess he was in, real quick.
He scanned through the books, read their summaries, but they all got returned to the shelf.
Just as he was about to give up, he saw it.
It was in the fiction section, but clumsy people always make mistakes.
It looked legit. This was it. The title said it all. This author wasn’t about to waste people’s time urging them to attend conferences that are worth an arm and a bum! This was definately it!
‘HOW TO GET RICH IN LESS THAN TEN DAYS’
He didnt bother with the summary this time. His ten days were starting right there.
He walked to his car, locked the doors, and opened the book.
No introduction. This was even better than he thought. Just a mere, ‘How to get rich in less than ten days, just do any of the following. They indeed guarantee immediate success.’
i) Work in a bank. (He is thinking……..ok, bullshit, but ill read on!)
You’re probably thinking i am going to tell you to work your way up to the position of bank manager, but nope! Even bank managers rely on salaries. Rather, work in the bank as that uneducated person, who is hired to dispose of the millions and millions of old notes that cannot pass through the ATM machines. Instead of destroying it, go invest. It is legit money after all. just because the bank dont want it, doesnt mean the rest wont accept it.
( He thinks again, now this is good. Wonder why he didnt think of that before. But he cant go anywhere near a bank. After attempting to rob three in a row, his face is surely one that will attract bullets! No.2 will be better!)
ii) Pick a governmet agancy and get on their nerves. You can wake up everyday to shout at their gates, or throw things at them, but make sure you do not do anything that is really against the law. This should however be something big enough to piss them off so that they take action. It would be better if the guards assault you. make sure bruises are visible. Blood is a must. It has to be shed, but do not, and i repeat DO NOT DIE! When this is done,, walk to a police station, take snaps, walk to your lawyer’s office, take more snaps, then go buy a house in the country as you sue their asses. (He wondered how he could not have thought of that one either. Governments always pay people millions and millions, and they never win cases! But this means exposing himself. He could get arrested before he throws the first banana peel at the parliamentary buliding! N0.3 it is!)
iii) Steal money. You may be saying… OMG i willl get caught, or OMG ic tried that before, but wait. There are steps to this. First spend the first four days making counterfeit money. Make lots and lots of these. It doesnt matter if they are 100% real (which is impossible), they just have to deceive someone from a distance.
The next day is the crucial one. Look for someone who has alot of money, but doesnt keep it in a bank. These are usually fellow thieves or drug dealers. Befriend them. Exchange the money. It will take them about two days to figure out it is not real, but they will think they just stole from a fool!
(This was it!. This was surely it! He had a cousin who dealt in that shit, and he knew loads of drug dealers. His own father was one of the leaders! This was going to be his lucky break, and nothing was going to stop him.) or so he thought!
If he had taken time to critically look at the book, he would have noticed the Word FICTION scribbled across, or better still, READ TO THE END, but his excitment got the better of him, and off he went.
A week later, he is in a jail cell. No teeth, swollen eye, broken arm, fallen cheekbones…. damn those drug dealers! They had read the same book!
He decides to read to the end and see what his other options could have been.
If only he had read past No.3!
Just one more page and he would have known, that indeed, this book would tell him how to get rich in less than ten days.
N0. 4 was there. Highlighted.
You are probably reading this in jail. Sorry you followed instructions too late.
‘THE BEST AND EASIEST WAY TO GET RICH IN LESS THAN TEN DAYS IS TO WRITE A BOOK ABOUT HOW TO GET RICH IN LESS THAN TEN DAYS, AND WATCH THE LAZY IDIOTS WHO DO NOT WANT TO WORK PAY YOU FOR YOU’RE BRILLIANCE!’

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